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There are moments that signal: this can’t be fixed, it’s time to leave
Some relationship problems can be solved – by talking, compromising, working on yourself. But there are moments that signal: it’s no longer fixable, it’s time to walk away. Answer honestly. If at least one “yes” – your relationship is probably doomed. Life coach Vitaliy Kursik told RBC-Ukraine about what questions you should ask yourself to understand whether your relationship has a chance for the future.
Do you have to pretend to be different in order to be accepted?
According to the expert, if you can’t be yourself because you are afraid of judgement, criticism or indifference – this is not love, but playing someone else’s script.
“It is impossible to wear a mask in a relationship forever, and sooner or later it will explode,” he warns.
Do you feel emotionally drained after communicating with your partner?
Relationships should be energising, not draining. If after every conversation you feel like you’ve run a marathon and arguments have become your daily workout, it’s not love, it’s a toxic addiction.
Are you afraid to speak your mind or say “no”?
Healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, not fear.
“If every conversation is a minefield game where you’re afraid of accidentally blowing up your partner’s emotions, think about it: is this love or control?” – says the coach.
Do you no longer see a future together?
If the thought of a life together makes you more anxious than happy, and you can’t imagine that partner around in 5-10 years – maybe he or she shouldn’t be there.
Do you not feel respected by him/her?
Without respect, there is no love or trust. If you are constantly devalued, criticised, ridiculed or looked down upon, it is not a partnership, but a relationship of victim and abuser.
Are you trying to “fix” your partner?
If your relationship is like fixing an old car – constant fixing, patience and trying to “tighten the nuts” – stop.
“People change only when they want to,” the expert reminds us.
Are you no longer happy together?
The main marker is the feeling of happiness. If you stay in that relationship only because of fear of loneliness, habit or a sense of duty – it’s not about love anymore.
What to do if you answered “yes”?
“The first step is to recognise the problem. The second is to see if it can be solved. And if your relationship is really leading nowhere, it may be worth finding the strength to walk away. You deserve love that doesn’t make you doubt yourself every day,” summarises Vitaly Kursik.
